Expat Single Parenting

Three Word Thursday No. 29

Today hasn’t been the greatest day. It’s Weiberfastnacht, the official start of the 5th Karneval season back home. I’m generally not very chipper on this day, because I’d rather be dressed in an awesome costume in Cologne. (Like I did two years ago.) Instead, I have the feeling that I’m pretty shitty in expat single parenting and that I’d much rather be singing Karneval songs and drinking beer. I feel like I haven’t accomplished anything. On top of that, my allergies are super bad these days and I just used the eye allergy reliefs drops before reading “remove contact before using”. Now I’m hoping that I won’t loose my eye sight before driving my daughter back home after swim team.

Being a single mom at its best.

By the way, my younger daughter sprained her ankle yesterday night and will most likely miss, at least some of her gym competitions. I was so motivated to go into work today, but had to cancel some of my lessons and a meeting, because I didn’t want to leave my hurt daughter home alone until 5 pm and had to take her to the doctor. On top of that she missed the 5th grade panoramic picture because I didn’t know about it and read her teacher’s email too late. We missed the deadline to sign up for the science fair at school (luckily I know the mom in charge). My older one behaves like a typical 14-year old throwing the random tantrums about homework, friends and whatnot. And the next minute, she’s the sweetest girl ever. Besides, I didn’t have enough time to work out and that makes me grumpy and might effect the digits on the scale. My husband and I both paid the rent for February (lucky landlord 😉 ) and I’ve ordered take-out like 3 times since Saturday. Apparently I didn’t turn the stove off before leaving to swim team and if my younger one and her friend wouldn’t have turned it off, I probably would have burned the house down today, too*.

I hate single parenting. For some reason, every time my husband has to go on his regular business trip to China, parenting and life in general seems to get even more challenging than it already is. But I know that I’m not the only one feeling this way. I’m sure that many of you fellow expat women and moms have to deal with similar struggles. Being far away from your family is often hard, but when my husband is traveling, it feels even worse. Then, I start wondering what I’m actually doing here and I miss my family and friends even more. What do you do when your spouse is traveling?

What helps?

Well, a Gin & Tonic for starters, but a drink does not really fix the problem permanently.

Lately, I can say that my every morning meditation helps a lot. It helps me to stay calm in difficult situations and to be more in the present moment.

Talking to my family on the phone and meeting friends here helps.

A change of perspective can also improve the situation of being temporarily a single parent. My friend has a new mantra for this year, which is “It is not a priority right now.” And that’s what I’ve been trying to do today as well. Doing dishes and cooking is not a priority today. But cuddling on the sofa with my daughter and watching a movie with my girls will be a priority.

Never forget about this box of chocolate, Forrest Gump was talking about.